All About Pacifiers
All three of my kids were paci kids to start, but only one stuck with it. I’m going to share more of Joey’s sleep story soon, but she actually did not get rid of her pacifier until she was 3.5 years old. 10/10 do not recommend letting it go on this long, but 10/10 DO recommend using a pacifier for newborns for so many reasons.
Pros of pacifier use:
The pacifier has been found to reduce the risk of SIDS by up to 90%. I could end this post right here because for me, that’s enough of a reason to use one, but since there are so many other benefits I’ll keep going.
Babies have an innate desire to suck. The pacifier fulfills this need when a baby does not have to be fed.
Pacifiers are soothing! Not only is this beneficial for newborns, but it can help with postpartum depression and anxiety because it reduces fussy/crying periods.
It’s been found that they can reduce distress during normal infant procedures such as vaccines.
Cons of Pacifier Use:
Babies may wake up when the paci falls out, so you can get into a cycle of constantly replacing it which can disrupt both your sleep and theirs.
There may be some correlation between pacifier use and ear infections.
If pacifier use is not discontinued by age 3, it could cause dental deformities or cavities.
Weaning later on may become difficult or stressful if a baby becomes attached.
What is a sleep prop?
A sleep prop, crutch, or association, is any external thing that is used each day and night to help aid a baby in getting to sleep. Sleep props can have a negative connotation when it comes to sleep training because the whole point of sleep training is to teach a child to fall asleep independently. Commonly discussed props such as rocking or feeding to sleep make it more difficult for a baby to learn to sleep independently. However, these are not the only sleep props! There are independent sleep props and dependent sleep props.
Dependent sleep props:
These are any sleep props that require parental or adult intervention. This is what you probably think of when you hear sleep prop. These include:
Rocking to sleep
Nursing to sleep
Bottle feeding to sleep
Bounce/sway/walk to sleep
Pacifier
The sleep prop is dependent if it is being used to put the child to sleep, not necessarily if it is being used to soothe a child if they are still being put down awake. Dependent sleep props are often associated with more disrupted sleep as the baby requires this prop to be present in order to go back to sleep if they wake up at night. So for example, if you rock your baby to sleep, you may have to rock them back to sleep after any wake up.
Independent sleep props:
These are any sleep props that remain present throughout the night and do not require any intervention to fall asleep or fall back asleep. These include:
Bedtime routine
Sleep sack or swaddle
Darkness
White noise
Pacifier
The pacifier as a sleep prop:
If you’re paying attention, you may have noticed that a pacifier is both a dependent and an independent sleep prop. How though?
This is dictated by age and development. As a newborn, a baby obviously cannot replace the pacifier. This requires parental intervention if a baby wakes up looking for it. Later on though, closer to 6 months, babies develop the motor skills to replace the paci themselves, and it can become a positive independent sleep association.
So should you use a pacifier?
This is personal preference. Personally, I REALLY love the pacifier in the newborn phase and before the 4 months sleep regression. As mentioned, the decreased SIDS risk is reason enough for me to use it. However, my other favorite pro to pacifier use is the ability to soothe a baby without feeding. Before about 4 months, baby sleep is so deep that they usually aren’t bothered when the pacifier falls out so you don’t have to spend the whole day or night replacing it. Overnight, if they take a pacifier and go back to sleep, they aren’t hungry as it’s almost impossible to soothe a truly hungry baby. This is a great way to stretch sleep without worrying that the baby isn’t getting enough to eat.
After the regression hits, and your baby begins to cycle through sleep stages every 45 minutes, it may become more of a hassle as you are constantly replacing the pacifier. This is the stage where you may want to decide if it’s something you want to move forward with or not. If you choose not to, this is a great time to sleep train without it. If you choose to keep it, you can practice teaching your baby to replace it during the day and you can leave multiple pacifiers in the crib so it's easy to find one. You’ll also have to manage your expectations and realize that you may be playing the paci game for a couple of months. The palmar grasp develops between 4-6 months, so by around 6 months or sooner, they should be able to replace it themselves if they can find it on their own overnight.
All three of my kids were sleep trained using a pacifier as a prop to replace bottle feeds. Landen dropped the pacifier on his own at around 3 months, and began twirling his hair or rubbing his head to self soothe. Graham dropped the pacifier as soon as he found his thumb, and today at almost 17 months he’s an avid thumb sucker. Joey loved her paci. She always had one in her mouth and as soon as she developed the skills to hold them she also always had at least one in each hand, sometimes two, to rub on her face. I took it away after she turned three, failed, and then finally took it away for good at 3.5. I’ll be sharing more about Joey’s paci journey very soon!
A note about nipple confusion:
I am not a doctor, and I am not a lactation consultant, so this is an opinion. I think nipple confusion is perpetuated by "breast is best" proponents (not on purpose, it's what they're taught to believe). I've never met a baby confused about nipples. I have met babies who refuse to take bottles or pacifiers because they weren't given the chance to learn early on. And I have met parents who think their babies have colic until they try a pacifier, because they didn't realize that all the baby wanted was to suck. I don’t believe there is any actual scientific research proving that nipple confusion actually exists, but I am open to learning if you know something I don’t.
I gave birth to Graham in a hospital that did not provide pacifiers to avoid nipple confusion and help establish breastfeeding and milk supply. I was not breastfeeding and they still wouldn't give me a pacifier even with the cart of formula they brought me. If I wasn't a secure, seasoned mom, this could have been more damaging to me than a pacifier would have been to my baby. I think there is a lot of false information about sleep circulating in the health care world, and I hope that we can all continue to learn that what’s best for babies is often simply what’s best for mom.